Most Deadly
by Shadow Vixin's Spring
Summary: Once again, Kougaiji’s out to kill the Saiyuki party. This time, though, he tries a different approach…get them where it hurts most. He sends two of his best assassins – Namida and Shinda – for a sneak attack. But...sneaky's not in their vocab.
1. Default Chapter

Spring again! Well, here's #1. This one was done by me and Vixen. The charachters of "Saiyuki" or "Gensomaden Saiyuki" (which ever you prefer to call it) are...not ours. Namida (the younger one) belongs to Vixen and Shinda (the girlwith Gojyo's hair) is mine. That's that. Remember, when you see this: (S) means I wrote it. Likewise, (V) means Vixen wrote it. The End. Enjoy.

Prolog: Kogaiji's Assassins 

(S) I have one last pair…" Kogaiji answered. "But I send them at my own risk. They're smart girls…excellent fighters and they have intelligent minds. Now, getting them to use those minds, that's another thing all together."

"Send them out," Gyokumen Koushu instructed, dismissing him with a wave of her pale hand.

"But…they…"

"I said send them, Kogaiji. Or do you want your mother to remain as she is for all eternity?"

"Yes ma'am."

Kogaiji walked out of the room and sank down against the wall. He ran his hand through his hair in a way that clearly read, "Distress".

"MINE!" someone shouted. Something ceramic crashed to the floor and crashed into a thousand pieces. And whatever it was – it sounded expensive.

Kogaiji leapt to his feet and ran into the dinning hall.

Two teenage demons were fighting over a stuffed puppy, screaming loudly at each other.

In the corner Lirin crouched behind a table, her hands clasped tightly over her ears.

Dokugakuji lifted her up as the two wrestled their way.

"Onichan!" Lirin shouted. "Make them shut up!"  
"Oy!" Kogaiji called. "Urusai! Shizuka na!"

The first girl stepped back and yanked the puppy out of the other's hand. "Gomen!"

"THAT'S MINE!" the other girl shrieked.

"Would you two SHUT UP?!" Kogaiji shouted.

The first girl dropped the stuffed animal.

"What's your problem?" she asked him.

"Sorry," he snapped. "You two have a mission."

"We have a mission?!" the second girl asked.

"YES!"

"Then why are you so uptight?" the second asked.

Kogaiji sighed and rested his head in his hands. "Because you're up against the Sanzo Party."

"Sanzo's having a party!" the second girl asked

"No, you moron," Kogaiji said fondly. "The Sanzo Party, not Sanzo's Party."

"What's the diff?" she asked.

"Never mind. Just hurry up and come back. Don't die."

"Promise!" the first girl said.

Chapter One: Sanzo Party meets the…Girls

Goku groaned weakly. "Sanzo," he mumbled. "Hara hetta!"

"Too bad," Sanzo mumbled.

"Daijobu," Hakkai assured him. "We're almost at the next town. About half an hour away."

"Good," Gojyo mumbled. "My legs are killin' me."

"Why?" Goku asked. "You've been doing nothing all morning."  
"What was that?!" Gojyo asked.

"All you've done is sleep."  
"Yeah? And what have you been doing monkey?"  
"Who you callin' a monkey, you damn water sprite?!"

"What'd you say?!" Gojyo asked.

"I said you're a damn water sprite!"

"Take it back!"

"No!"

"I said take it back or I'll shoot you!!"

"You don't have a gun!"

"Then I'll cut you into tiny pieces and stomp on your pitiful monkey remains! If there are any!"

"You're gonna slice me with that shovel you call a weapon?! I don't think so, cockroach!"

"At least I don't fight with an extendable chopstick!"

"Yeah?! Well…"

A loud gunshot rang through the desert, silencing them instantly.

(V)They looked at the front seat where Sanzo sat holding the gun over his head.

"If you don't shut up I'll kill you," he muttered.

Gojyo and Goku sat down quietly.

"It's so peaceful!" Hakkai exclaimed with a bright smile.

(S) "Now," Sanzo muttered.

Hakkai laughed lightly.

"Hey!" Goku said, jumping forward. "There's the village!"

"We're not blind, monkey," Gojyo mumbled.

"Who's a monkey?!" Goku snapped, getting up in Gojyo's face. "You don't mean ME do you?!"

"Of course I do."

"Why I ought a…"

Sanzo fired his gun into the air. "If I waste one more bullet," he said, "it'll be your heads."

(V) Goku and Gojyo stared at Sanzo for a moment. Somehow, they knew that next few minutes it would take getting to the village wouldn't be very pleasant.

* * *

"Hey! That's my spring roll you filthy cockroach!" Goku yelled.

Incredibly, they had made it to the village in one piece and had decided to have a little lunch. Of course, this gave ride to more conflicts.

"I don't see your name on it monkey. Why don't you find a banana or something?"

(S) "I don't wanna banana! I want MY spring roll!"

"Too bad." Gojyo took a bite out of the veggie roll and Goku's poor little heart split into a thousand pieces.

"My…my…my…my, my, my…my spring roll…" he mourned. "Fare well, dear Yukiko! I barley knew you!"

"You named it?!" Gojyo asked.

"Yes I named HER!" Goku snapped. "She was a special spring roll!"

"Special!" Gojyo ragged. "YOU'RE special!"

"What's that supposed to mean?!"

(V) "You really are a stupid monkey."

"WHAT?! Let's take this outside!"

"What a racket," Sanzo muttered, half to himself, half to Hakkai.

Suddenly, the doors of the restaurant were flung open and two demon girls carrying overly large guns marched in.

(S) The younger looked about Goku's age. She had neck length grown hair and gorgeous, innocent looking gold eyes.

The older looked a little younger than Gojyo. She had long crimson hair that fanned out in elegant curves behind her.

"Sanzo party!" she shouted. "Please stand up!"

(V) "Please stand up! Please stand up!" the younger girl added.

Everyone in the restaurant stared at her, clearly not taking them seriously.

"So I like Eminem. Is that such a crime?" she asked.

They continued to stare.

"I'll shoot you if you don't look away!" she shouted, aiming her gun at the nearest table.

Everyone averted their eyes immediately.

(S) The older girl rolled her eyes. "Now," she said, brushing back a crimson lock, "all rise!" she pulled back the cock of her gun and pointed it up at the ceiling.

"All sit!" the second commanded. The crowd sat down immediately.

"All rise!" the girl in leather commanded.

"All sit!"

"All rise!"

"All sit!"

"All rise!"

"Sit!"

"Rise!"

"Sit!

"Rise!"

The crowd, not daring disobey either girl, sat down and stood up at their command. Soon, it looked like the room was full of synchronized dancers.

"If they all sit, how the hell are they supposed to get outside?!" the crimson haired girl asked.

"What is this, some kind of joke?!" a man from the crowed asked.

"Shut up!" the crimson haired girl commanded, shooting him in the forehead. "Now all of you sit down and be quiet!"

"Don't you mean stand?" the second girl asked.

"I don't care anymore! Just get the Sanzo party out before I shoot everyone!" she said, blowing a hole in the roof.

"Okay, I got a couple of questions," the brown haired girl announced. "First, which one of you is Sanzo?!"

Sanzo stood up.

"Okay. Second. Who belongs to his party?"

Goku, Gojyo and Hakkai got to their feet alongside their monk friend.

"Good! Last question. Why wasn't I invited?!"

Goku and Gojyo exchanged confused looks.

"Where's the cake?!"

"Idiot!" the crimson haired girl raged. "The Sanzo party, not Sanzo's party!"

"Oh. Well, that changes everything. Get outside! All four of you! And take that flying chicken with you, green man!"


	2. Reality

Chapter 2: Reality 

(S) "Alright!" the crimson haired girl shouted, hauling her huge gun over her shoulder. "I need names. Starting with the little guy with the crown."

"Why should I tell you?" Goku asked suspiciously.

"That's a good question, Shin-chan. Why does he have to tell us?" the second girl asked.

"Cuz I said so, that's why! Now spit it out monkey!" Shinda the half-daemon spat.

"Who you calling a 'monkey' you…female kappa!"

"KAPPA!" Shinda raged. "I'M TOO PRETTY TO BE A KAPPA!"

"Do us all a favor and tell her your name, Mr. Monkey. Please? Or it's gonna be my head," the brown-haired girl begged.

"Fine," Goku mumbled. "Goku. Son Goku."

"Thank you. Moving on to the chicken man," Shinda muttered.

"Cho Hakkai desu," he said willingly, smiling at the two girls.

"Great. Mr. Holy Monk?"

Sanzo lit a cigarette and breathed in the smoke. "Sanzo," he replied, blowing it out through his nostrils.

"All good. Pink hair last."

"Make me," Gojyo answered.

"Do you _really _want me to do that, Pinky?" Shinda asked dangerously, putting a finger under Gojyo's chin.

"Yes," he said, pushing it away.

"Fine. We'll fight. If I win, you tell me your name."

"And if I win, you sleep with me."

"You dirty son of a –!"

"Well?"

"FINE! But I'm _not _gonna lose, you hear me!"

"I'll be the judge of that," Gojyo said, pulling out his "shovel".

Shinda growled and pulled out her weapon: two katanas joined together by a thick metal chain. "Ready?"

"When you are," Gojyo replied, holding his weapon at arms length.

"Fight!" Goku said.

Shinda leaped into the air and swung one end of her sword-chain at Gojyo. He dodged it expertly and jerked his weapon like a fishing rod, aiming directly at her feet. The chain inside shot out, wrapping itself around her ankles like a snake ready to strike down it's pray.

Gojyo jerked on the chain and pulled her down.

"Still think you're gonna win, huh?"

Shinda growled and kicked the chain off of her ankles.

She ran at him, wielding her swords expertly like numb-chucks.

Gojyo dogged again and again. He ducked under them, jumped over them, swung to the right or left of them.

With a final blow, Shinda managed to cut a small wound across his cheek.

"You're slowing down!" she said happily, twirling her sword-chain over her head.

"I'm not out of it yet," Gojyo said, smirking. He swung the blunt end of his staff at her.

Shinda leaped into the air and flipped, landing on her feet behind Gojyo.

"Too slow!" she teased.

Gojyo swung at her again. Again she dogged the blow. And again.

"Run, run, run! As fast as you can! Can't catch me, I'm the ginger-bread man!" she said, jumping up as he let loose the chain.

She landed gracefully on her feet. "Your getting sloppy, Pinky!"

Gojyo growled in frustration and swung his chain at her feet. She leaped up and locked her knees. Her legs made contact with his chest, knocking the wind out of him and forcing him to the ground. She slammed her katanas on either side of his head and sat down triumphantly on top of him. "I believe I just won," she smirked.

"Sha," Gojyo growled. "…Gojyo."

Shinda stared at him. "Sha…Gojyo?" she asked, bewildered.

"Didn't I just say that?!" he asked. "Get off of me!"

"NO!" she squeaked, throwing herself on top of him. "I'm never gonna let you go!"

"WHAT THE HELL?!" Gojyo asked, trying to pry her off.

"Don't you recognize me…onichan?"

* * *

**To all those who don't know… "onichan" is Japanese for "brother". **

**- Spring**


	3. Remember

Chapter 3: Remember

**Unfortunately, it's not Vixen. She's getting on my nerves. It's Spring…for a change. Well, I got impatient. Chapter three: Remember. Read on…**

"Gojyo-onichan!" Shinda said, folding her arms impatiently. "How can you not remember me?!"

"I DIDN'T KNOW YOU HAVE A BROTHER!" the brown-haired girl, Namida, said.

"And I didn't know you had a sister!" Goku added.

"I don't!" Gojyo snapped.

Shinda leapt up and turned her back on him. "Your so mean, onichan!" she pouted.

"For the last time, I'm _not _your brother!" Gojyo snapped, brushing off his pants.

Shinda whirled around. "Not biologically, no! But you used to let me call you 'onichan' when we were little! You said that after your brother left you were lonely and then you said 'Chocho-chan, from now on, you have to call me onichan!' So there!"

"Chocho-chan…? Chochiku?!" Gojyo asked.

"Took you a while," Shinda said, looking away stubbornly.

Next thing she knew, she felt strong arms being wrapped around her waist, and a firm body pressed against hers. "Gomen, Chocho-chan," he whispered, hugging her tightly.

"Gojyo-kun…" Shinda said softly, putting her hand on his cheek.

"Did I miss something?!" Goku asked angrily, pulling Gojyo away from Shinda…err…Chocho-chan.

Namida pulled her away and slapped her. "Snap out of it!" she said, slapping her again. "We're supposed to kill them, not seduce them!"

"WHO WAS SEDUCING WHO?!" Shinda asked.

"Just kill him! I wanna go home!"

"Iie!" she said stubbornly.

"Gojyo! They're here to kill us! Not kiss us!" Goku snapped.

"KISS! I'm not kissing her! What do you think I am, perverted?!" he snapped.

"YES!"

"YOU STUPID MONKEY!"

"DON'T CALL ME A MONKEY!"

"MONKEY! MONKEY!"

"I'M NOT A MONKEY!"

"FINE! GORILLA!"

"I SAID I'M NOT A MONKEY!"

"GORILLAS ARE APES YOU DUMB ASS MONKEY!"

"THERE'S NO DIFFRENCE! AND DON'T CALL ME A MONKEY!"

"Hey, um, monkey?" Namida asked.

"I'M NOT A MONKEY!" Goku snapped. "MY NAME'S GOKU! GOKU, GOKU, GOKU, GOKU!"

"Fine! 'Goku' then!"

"What!"

"…can I play with your stick?"

"NO!"

"MEAN!" she cried…literally.

Goku looked at her and rubbed his eyes. "Stop crying!" he said. "You're gonna make me start!"

"You're so mean!" she wined between buckets of tears.

"FINE! TAKE IT!" Goku said, throwing it over to her.

She watched as the highly decorative bow-staff rolled to her feet, squatted down, pocked it, and stood back up. Mindlessly, she kicked it back to him. "Thank you!" she said, walking over to the restaurant door. "Come on!" she said. "I won't kill you guys if you buy me a spring roll!"

Sanzo sighed. "That's all we need," he mumbled, "another Goku," and walked in after her.

"Haiyaku, Goku-kun!" Namida called.

"Hai!" Goku answered, running after them.

"Hara heta! Hara heta! Tabemono! Tabemono!" they chanted.

"Kawai!" Hakkai smiled, walking out of the sun.

"'Kawai' my butt," Sanzo muttered, disappearing through the door.

"_Gojyo-kun!" _

_A little girl with long crimson hair held up a bouquet of beautiful red flowers. She tugged at a white shirt, standing on her tip-toes. "Gojyo-kun!" she repeated._

_The boy looked down. "Chocho-chan…" _

_She smiled. "I picked these for you!"_

_He bent down and tucked a strand of his own crimson hair behind his ear. "Thank you," he said, taking the flowers from her._

_She threw her arms around him. "It's gonna be okay, Gojyo-kun!" she said, burying her face in his chest. "I'm sure he'll come back!"_

_The boy laughed. "Even if he doesn't, I still have Chocho-chan, ne? You're not ever gonna leave me, right?"_

_The little girl shook her head. "Never!"_

"_Good…then from now on, Chocho-chan will call me 'onichan' not 'Gojyo-kun', okay?"_

"_Hai!" _

Gojyo slowly opened his eyes, taken from his dream by the rays of the morning sun. Everyone else was still fast asleep.

He got to his feet drowsily and yawned, tying back his long hair.

He opened the door to the balcony they shared with the room next door and walked out into the cool morning air.

He stretched widely and leaned forward on the railing.

Behind him, a glass door slid open. "Gojyo-kun?"

"'From now on, Chocho-chan will call me 'onichan' not 'Gojyo-kun'.'" he said. "That's what I told you back then, wasn't it?" he asked, not looking away from the rising sun.

"Uh huh."

"Why should that change?" he asked her.

"What do you mean, Gojyo-kun?"

"Why should you call me 'Gojyo-kun' now that were older? Have I stopped being your 'onichan'?"

Shinda stared at him, startled by the question. "I-iie," she answered.

"Then why are you calling me 'Gojyo-kun'? I haven't stopped calling you 'Chocho-chan', have I?" he asked.

"Iie," she answered, leaning on the railing next to him, "onichan."

Gojyo blew out a puff of smoke from his cigarette.

"Onichan?" she asked.

"Nani?"

"Just because we're older now…does that mean I don't have to nag you any more?"

"No," Gojyo replied, taking a puff from his half-finished smoke.

"Good! Then get that out of your mouth!" she said, snatching it away from him. "Do you know what this stuff does to you?! It gives you black lungs! On top of that, your teeth get all yucky!"

Gojyo watched as she crushed the cigarette under her heel.

"From now on, no smoking!"

Gojyo laughed. "Yes ma'am."

"And don't call me 'ma'am'!" she spat. "It makes me sound old!"

"Yes Chocho-chan."

"Much better!"

Inside, Goku and Namida watched Shinda spit out orders.

"Gee, I sure am glad I'm not Gojyo," Goku said quietly.

"I get this all the time," Namida said dully. "'Namida! Turn off the lights!' 'Namida! Don't eat in the room!' 'Namida! Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah!'"

Goku laughed.

"You think that's funny?" Namida asked. "Wait till she starts getting on _your _case, monkey-kun."

Goku's laughter immediately ceased. "I'm not a monkey," he pouted.

**And that's chapter three! Hopefully, Vixen will be the one doing chapter four, but don't hold your breath. This is Spring, signing out. **


	4. Off again?

**Guess who! Yeah…Springwolf --. Sorry I haven't updated in so long. I sorta…forgot about this. Well, now I'm back with an update! I'd like to say the same for Vixen…--;**

Chapter four: Off again?

"Gojyo-onichan!" Shinda shouted. "Here! Carry my bag!"

Gojyo hoisted the bag over his shoulder and took a puff from the cigarette he was smoking. "You used to be such a gentle girl," he muttered. "What happened?"

"You LEFT ME!" she shouted. "This snappy me is YOUR FAULT! I USED TO BE SO CUTE! NOW I'M JUST REALLY, REALLY SEXY WITH A BAD ATTITUDE!"

"No, that's not true!" Gojyo muttered, dumping the bag in Hakuryu's trunk. "You're not _that_ sexy."

Shinda stared at him. "Boy, I shudda seen that one coming. Jerk! You never loved me! Only Doku cared!" she cried, storming back into the hotel.

"Chocho-chan!" Gojyo shouted, running after her into the hotel. "CHOCHO-CHAN! Get back here!"

Namida and Goku sat on the ground, watching them.

"I'm glad I'm not old," Namida said. "I hate boys. They're so clingy."

Goku glared at her. "Then what are you doing traveling with a truck full of men?" he asked.

"Men!" Namida asked. "You guys are MALE!"

"Namida!" Goku wined exasperated. "You're kidding!"

"Relax, Monkey breath! I'm just kidding! Geez," Namida said, waving a hand in dismissal. "How are we all gonna fit in that car, by the way?"

"They'll find a way," Goku muttered.

"Guys!" Hakkai called. "We're leaving now!"

Goku jumped up and ran to the car. "Dibs this side!" Goku said, leaping into the back. "Common, Nami!"

"Oh, no! Goku, you can't sit there!" Hakkai smiled.

"What'da'ya mean?" Goku asked.

"We have a few more people in the car than usual, so it's gonna be a little different," Hakkai said, climbing into the driver's seat.

"This is gonna be interesting," Sanzo muttered, slamming the car door.

* * *

"Gojyo! Stop moving!" Goku snapped.

"It you're not happy, get off my lap!" Gojyo shouted back.

"You think I wouldn't? THERE'S NO SPACE!"

"I can make space!" Gojyo said threateningly.

"How!" Goku asked.

"By throwing you outta the car, that's how!" Gojyo snapped.

"Try, I dare ya!" Goku snapped back.

"Shut up, you two!" Shinda shouted. "You're getting on my nerves!"

"Stay out of it, Chocho!" Gojyo snapped.

"YOU WANT MORE SPACE?" Shinda asked. "YOU WANT MORE SPACE! FINE! I'LL GIVE YOU MORE SPACE!" She jumped out of the car. "I'm going home!"

For once, everyone was silent as they watched Shinda run into the forest, her footsteps fading with distance.

"So," Goku asked, staring at Gojyo. "Anyone gonna go and get her?

. "Fine, I'll do it!" Gojyo said, leaping out and running after her into the forest. "Chocho-chan! Come back! There are bugs in the forest!"

There was another awkward silence as they watched Gojyo fade into the distance.

"We'll camp here tonight," Hakkai said, stepping out of the car and pulling out a few blankets.

**Not a very long chapter is it? Oh well. Chocho-chan in trouble again.**


End file.
